15 More Free Original Memes For You To Use

A few days ago, I posted a bunch of memes that I made (see them here and here.)

Here are 15 more, free for your use, no catch. Just download them and use them as you please.

For best download results, click on a small image below and it will enlarge. Then right-click and select "Save" to your PC or device. (If you don't enlarge it first, you'll be saving a small version of an image.)

They Didn't Need Mail-In Ballots

Bill Clinton Admires His Portrait Hillary portrait in the Kremlin "You ain't black, Dad" "You're A Cool Dad"

Brian Stelter - New Look, Same Great Face Hillary transparent  background GIF Mao: "I will 60 million of you" "Okay Power" CNN Brian Stelter, Transp Backgrnd Enjoy!

CNN's Brian Stelter Never Looked So Good

Brian Stelter is keeping up with current trends (click to enlarge)

Brian Stelter, one of CNN's talking heads, wants to keep up with the changing times.

Ze shows off zer new look in a recent promotional shot for the failing network.

"Call me Brianna," Stelter said, "I'm woke as hell and glam, baby."

Man Marries Dog? How a Nigerian Website Helped Perpetuate Hoax Story About Human-Animal Wedlock

February 2, 2014 - Did a man marry a dog in California? No, but there are a lot of people who are busy re-tweeting, "liking," and copying-and-pasting a fake news story about it. The story is a hoax, but a lot of gullible sheeple actually believe the story, even though it's painfully obvious that it's a not real.

It's damned depressing to know that so many people are so damned ignorant that they are not able to distinguish parody from reality.

I came across the fake story via a timeline photo on Facebook today. It was reposted (shared) by "J," who apparently swallowed the story as truth. She even prefaced her repost of the photo, originally posted by "Scannews," with this comment: "And the left has destroyed the definition of marriage. And here we go!!!!"  

Nigeria's best news source?

Sure, here we go. Another gullible fool breathlessly spreading bad information. With four exclamation marks, no less. What's really happened is that morons have destroyed the definition of "well informed."

"J" was so eager to believe the man-married-dog story that she didn't do 60 seconds of research to confirm whether it was true -- or not. She is probably unaware that the photo and fake story she shared were posted by a Nigerian news organization called Scannews.com.

Actually, Scannews shamelessly copied and pasted an old item from a parody website called National Report, where all of the "news" stories are fake.

But NR doesn't intend to fool anybody. They're just having fun, in the same way that The Onion produces fake news with a smirk and a wink. In 2002, a major Beijing newspaper republished a fake story about the U.S. Congress demanding a new Capitol building with a retractable dome. Ridiculous, yes, but the Beijing Evening News "translated portions of the Onion's tall tale word-for-word in the international news page," reported Wired.com. In exactly the same way, Scannews was suckered by the National Report man-animal marriage spoof story.

The "Scannews" page on Facebook represents Scannews.com, an online Nigerian news service. The "About Us" page at their main website is sadly amusing. It says this:

Revealed: What The Fake Sign Language Interpreter Really Said At Mandela's Memorial Service

"You came in like a wrecking ball."

Dec. 11, 2013 - The "sign language interpreter" at South Africa's memorial service for Nelson Mandela yesterday is being called a fraud.

But is he really a fake? A new video (below) offers a spoken interpretation of the man's signing.

The unidentified man stood next to world leaders paying homage to Mandela. On Tuesday the national director of the Deaf Federation of South Africa said he was a fake. Authorities don't know who he was - let alone how he was able to get on stage. People around the globe are scratching their heads, wondering if the man was for real or faking his signing.

"The scandal over the interpreter," reports Associated Press, "is another indication of bad organization of the historic memorial service at a huge soccer stadium. Other difficulties included public transportation breakdowns which hindered mourners from getting to the event and a faulty audio system that prevented many of the tens of thousands in the stadium from hearing the leaders' speeches." Full AP story...

"Eye Of The Sparrow" — A Bad Lip Reading of the First 2012 Presidential Debate

Possibly the best one yet from Bad Lip Reading: A brilliant spoof of the first Romney-Obama presidential debate. This is so funny you might want to go to the bathroom now to avoid an accident....

Anderson Cooper Comes Out As Albino

Anderson Cooper of CNN has come out of the closet to admit that he is an albino. "Pigment challenged, actually," Cooper said at a press conference today.

UPDATED 2024: He's still an albino.

Anderson Cooper is a lifelong albino

Cooper doesn't mind the term "albino," but thinks it carries too many negative connotations thanks to Hollywood's portrayals of albino people as evil freaks. It's "all about albino pride," he said.

"Albino-American is kind of nice too," he said, "although I guess we're not really an ethnic group. We should be, though." He went to point out that albinism is nothing to fear and is not contagious. "You cannot catch albinism," he said, "no matter how hard you try."

Albinism, or "hypopigmentation," is not a laughing matter, says Cooper. It's a genetic disorder that has no cure. "I'm not aware of any 5K runs to help fight albinism, are you?" he asked rhetorically.

Albinism is not a fatal disorder, it does make it difficult for albino animals to blend in with their surroundings. "The up side, though," chuckled Cooper, "is that we're more visible to drivers at night."

He said that revealing his albinism makes him feel "more free to be myself," and that he can now "stop wearing blue contact lenses to hide my albino condition."

Some people are shocked by his pink eyes when they first see them, but Cooper just gives his award-winning smile and tells them to "think pink."

Most people, he says, do not have a problem with his eyes. "They match the rest of me," he says, "which is so obviously lacking any pigmentation that my pink eyes just seem more normal, if you will." That's why he wears blue contact lenses on air.

"Didn't everyone already suspect that Anderson was an albino?" asked one of the reporters at the press conference. "I mean, come on," she said.

Napoleon vs Napoleon in Another Epic Rap Battle!

"Epic Rap Battles of History" is one of the funniest video series to grace the algorithms of YouTube - ever. They are spoofs, obviously, produced by "Nice Peter," one per month. You can follow Nice Peter on YouTube and on Facebook.

Bin Laden's Last Facebook Entry Revealed

Relax. This won't piss of the terrorists any more than they already are.

Hat tip: StrangePolitics.com.

Video - The Most Dangerous Of All Illegal Aliens (Satire)

Illegal immigrants from Canada: Don't be fooled.

This video is satire. 

"Two renegade US immigration officers crack down on the toughest immigrants to catch. I.C.E. will continue with many more episodes at its new home, Atomic Wedgie TV.  Subscribe to Atomic Wedgie TV now for more upcoming I.C.E."

 

Chicago Gay Pride 2009 to Emphasize Accomplishments, Not Crotches (Satire)

A spokesperson for the 2009 Chicago Gay Pride Parade says that the emphasis will be more on "pride" this year and "less on crotches." 

"We're all very proud," the spokesperson said, "of the great accomplishments that so many gays and lesbians have made. We're proud of our artistic contributions, of our economic and business success, of our overcoming of great social barriers and centuries of persecution." 

"Then why" I asked, "is there so much emphasis on crotches? What does a bare rump hanging out of a tutu have to do with any of that? Doesn't it just perpetuate tired, undesirable stereotypes?" 

"Sure," the spokesperson replied, "that's why, this year, we're requiring all of the parade participants to wear modest, business casual clothing. I mean, if you go to a Polish Pride parade or an African-American pride parade, for example, the participants use the parade to highlight their accomplishments, not their genitalia. It's a forum for promoting their contributions to society, not to solicit a quick hum job in the alley." 

"So, no more lewd parade float riders? No more throbbing crotches?" I asked. 

"No more," the spokesman said. Of course, this conversation never happened. No spokesman said those things, and probably never will. 

Meter Rape

Click to enlarge

Joe Moore Caption Contest!

Yes! Create a fun caption and win a prize. Really! For details go here.

Original photo from Rogers Park in 1,000 Words

Expanded "Miles of Murals" Project in Rogers Park

CHICAGO - An expanded "Miles of Murals" project in the Rogers Park neighborhood is underway. The project should have begun a year ago, but miscommunication between SSA#24, DevCorp North and the Chicago Transit Authority (CTA) caused a delay. "We're happy to announce that the old 'Mile of Murals' is now the 'Miles of Murals'," said a member of the SSA. She asked to remain anonymous. "The expanded project will involve the construction of miles of new walls, all of which will be covered by magnificent art." Additionally, the horrible day-glo mural on the Morse Avenue CTA overpass has been replaced with a more tasteful reproduction of an ancient Roman mural. "The ancient Romans were magnificent," commented the SSA member, "I don't care what Jesse Jackson says about Western Civilization. Good is good, no matter who did it. All that 'hey hey ho ho Western Civ has got to go' is bullcrap."

Video Report: Voters Want Blood, Death

'No Values Voters' Looking To Support Most Evil Candidate

FABO Holds "NoBama" Rally in Rogers Park

CHICAGO - Folks Against Barack Obama (FABO) met in Rogers Park last night to select a representative to travel to Denver for the Democrat National Convention later this month. FABO is a pro-Hillary, anti-business group that believes it would be sexist to not nominate Clinton. "Women have been held down more than any other group," a FABO member said, "like men, for instance. Barack Obama is a man. Therefore, he is a sexist, and we cannot accept that." Mr. Farber asked to remain anonymous. No vote was taken, however. Citing House Speaker Nancy Pelosi as a role model, FABO's chairperson Dick Lukenzipper (photo) said he refused to allow an up or down vote on anybody. Lukenzipper became angry when asked why he would not allow a vote. "I control the gavel, not you," he yelled, "Look, if this is how you're going to act, get the hell out!" Some FABO members will try again next week to get a vote on a Denver representative. In the meantime, disgruntled FABO members are urging each other to phone Lukenzipper over the weekend to insist that she allow a vote next week.

CTA TIF Meeting: Resistance is Futile

Weird meeting with CTA President Ron Huberman last night to discuss the ongoing renovation of the Howard Street CTA Station. The meeting was in gymnasium at Gale Elementary School in Rogers Park. Huberman were here to placate the little folks (us) by pretending to care about how we care about our own neighborhood. Huberman spent about five minutes telling us that he was once a beat cop in the hood. Dunno if that was to establish a bond with us, to threaten us subtly by pointing out that he's good with a gun, or what. Alderman Moore (49th Ward) was there and said a whole lot of nothing, as usual. Look, let's be honest. Moore doesn't give a crap about this or you or me, really, and Huberman already has his mind made up to grab 4.7 million bucks from the Howard Street TIF. One of the attendees asked Huberman, in an eloquent mini-speech, why he doesn't keep his mitts off the local TIF dough and dip into the tens of millions of dollars being pissed away to mothball CTA's Magnificent Failure at Block 37 in the Loop. No answer from Huberman to that, of course. I won't bore you with fine details - it doesn't matter because this is another done deal put before us to try to make us think we're involved. We ain't, folks, and lemme tell ya, Ron Huberman could sell shit to a maggot. Joe Moore, for instance, seems to have bought all the shit that Huberman has placed before him. Joe oughta watch Ron. Ron pretends he's interested in what people are saying, like Joe tries to do, but Huberman is more convincing. Daley's Golden Boy, Huberman is able to send out these weird hypno rays from his eyes to try to stupify us (see photo). You could see them if you looked close enough, but the ray seem to work only on stupid people. The room was filled with about 45 people, most of whom seemed to be too smart for Ron's eye rays. Huberman tried to frighten us by threatening to stop work on the half-finished Howard Station renovation. BS about the escalators needing to be completely enclosed, for example, even though the escalators at Loyola Station have been open to rain and snow exposure for years with no real problem. Huberman lied. He cajoled. He pouted. He made Jim Ginderske uncomfortable, for Jim found himself in the uncomfortable position of not being the prettiest boy in the room. Unfortunately, as I said, the TIF money for this over-budgeted, beyond projected completion, a done deal. This was all for show. Bottom line: CTA will rape and pillage as needed, they will threaten some miniature local version of a Doomsday scenario if we stand in their way, and ultimately, we will not be able to resist. Resistance is futile, folks.

Joe Moore Fulfills a Campaign Promise!

Join Us for a MOVIE IN TOUHY PARK!

Howdy Neighbor,

I am writing to invite you to grab a case of beer and some grub and join my new wife, my kids by a previous marriage and me for my annual MOVIE IN THE DARK this Sunday, August 3rd, at dusk (approximately 8:15 p.m.) at Touhy Park, 7300 block of Paulina (across from the new Clark Street Fire Station, near all the prostitutes and drug traffic that happens around that time of night). Joining me as a sponsor for this year's Movie in the Park is Cook County Commissioner Larry Suffredin and the Touhy Park Advisory Council. That's right, we're sponsors, which means Larry and I are paying for the movie out of our own pockets!

This year's movie is THE WATER BOY: LEGEND OF JIM GINDERSKE, an adaptation of the scary novel The Water Boy. It stars a young man who enters into a mysterious pact with the Devil and goes to work for a corrupt local politician as his"water boy" (loosely based on a sports team's water boy). The corrupt politician goes on to Washington to become the Director of the Federal Prison System, into which he later becomes an inmate known as the fabled Rogers Park Monster. Water Boy Jim visits his former mentor in prison, and all hell breaks loose. Hilarious!

For the movie trailer, CLICK HERE.

After the movie, I plan to booze it up at a nearby tavern. Adults only, of course! Take the kids home and join the missus and me for LIQUOR AFTER DARK!

I look forward to enjoying this delightful fantasy evening with you.

See you Sunday!

Sincerely,

Joe Moore

Visit the website of the 49th Ward

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Today's Satirical Funny Photo of Joe Moore

See, this is a satirical photo of Alderman Joe Moore. He is a public figure who holds an elected office. Got that? It's not news, it's not "real." It's fair game.

Okay? Now you can look at it.

Don't let Joe see you laughing at it!

He'll get mad. Really, reeeeeally mad.

Click it for large image.

Sapienphobia Afflicts Some Homos

Years ago, I was driving around Los Angeles and listening to the Rick Dees show on the radio. He had this stupid segment of the show wherein he made nuisance phone calls to random phone numbers. He dialed a number, the phone rang. A woman answered.

Dees: Hello ma'am. I understand that your husband is a homo sapien. Is that true?

Woman: (Angry) What? My husband ain't no homo sapien!

See, that woman was just waaaay too uptight, don'tcha think? I mean, the word "homo" freaked her out. That and the fact that she was obviously stupid and you have what I like to call "sapienphobia."

Sapienphobia was that bitch's problem. It she wasn't so afraid of the sapiens among us she would be able to accept all homos. My guess is that she was a homo habilis. I don't mean to be un-PC, but frankly dear, homo habilis folk just aren't as smart as we are. We are all homo sapiens, whether that cow likes it or not.

There have been many homos in human history. For example, these folks:

Homo habilis, Homo georgicus, Homo erectus, Homo ergaster, Homo antecessor, Homo heidelbergensis, Homo neanderthalensis, Homo floresiensis and Homo sapiens sapiens.

That last one is you, me and most of our neighbors. Lots of us don't deserve the double "sapiens" part of the name, 'cuz they're only half as smart as fabulous people like you and me.

Protest At Morse Theatre