Tuesday, November 9, 2010

New High Security World Headquarters Are Da Bomb

Chicago News Bench's new headquarters are secure against any kind of conventional attack -- and more. The facility features triple-hardened electronics to withstand an EMP, a nearby atomic weapons explosion or any magnitude of solar flare, SEIU protest or MoveOn.org boycott. Click on the images to enlarge them. Our small, custom built nuclear power facility and a self-sustaining hydroponic farm underground can, theoretically, keep the headquarters running autonymously for up to 17 years. In addition, we have several helipads and a 2-kilometer landing strip out back. These photos were taken just outside of one of the perimeter checkpoints. We can only tell you that the new HQ is somewhere west of Reston, Virginia. If we get more specific about the location, we'd we'd have to send someone out to kill you. So, you know, don' t even ask. Photo manipulation by T.H. Mannis