News and Photographs Thomas J. Westgard Doesn't Want You To See. Which is why, you see, he deleted the following within the past 24 hours. He is referring to the mounds of poop on the public parkway in front of his office. TJ habitually lets his leash-free pit bull crap on the parkway, and then not pick it up. You don't have to be a genius to find this cached on Google. You'd think by now TJ would know about the caching feature. (See all of Westgard's cached poop!)

Thursday, December 20, 2007

Poop Confession

Okay, you caught me. You just don't know at what.

It's true, I am responsible for the large piles of poop in front of my office. For the last several days, the guilt has been eating away at my soul, and I just have to confess. My heart has been torn out of my chest at the thought of my poor little dog being unfairly accused of leaving messes. He is not to blame - I am.

You see, some strange impulse has taken over me this last month, and every morning at 3:20 a.m., I venture out into the parkway on Sheridan for my daily, um, bodily activity. Something about it just feels so right, so complete. I can't explain it - you just wouldn't understand.

But, fear not, you are in no danger of stepping in dog poop. Please stop wrongfully blaming my dog. Those are piles of human excrement that Mannis has been poking through. It's true, and you can verify it. I promise I'll start eating more peanuts and maybe some corn, so that Jocelyn doesn't have to put her latex gloves on again...

Posted by twestgard at 8:42 AM